Archives for September 2015

Influence & Inner Dialogue (Excerpt #1 from Mass Influence by Teresa de Grosbois)

September 30, 2015 Leave a Comment


I have created some epic failures in my life.

B-1R0A9839-SmallMost of them start in my mind.

The first failure I remember happened when I was two, just starting to speak.

I am sitting in the corner of a crowded kitchen, jostling for space along with my nine siblings and a dog. Everyone is in a rush to finish something or get somewhere. I, the youngest, am un-noticed in my corner. My overworked, exhausted mother has forgotten to feed me. I watch her scrape food into the garbage.

I’m angry. Pissed off, as only a two-year old can be. I cry in frustration.

“I’m not important.” I tell myself. “I’m less than the stinking garbage.”

I accept the thought as true.

That inner dialogue sticks with me.

It does not matter that I grow up in a supportive, loving family, nor that my mother and I become close as adults and she becomes one of my greatest role models. “I’m not important” runs in the background of everything I say and do. It is both the driver that helps me succeed and the trap that has me fail. This inner mantra has both caused me to make my life about becoming a force for change in the world and has motivated me to say some of the stupidest things that could ever escape my lips.

The Influence of Inner Dialogue

Everyone is writing about inner dialogue these days. What many authors fail to point out is that while your inner dialogue is inescapable and humiliating, once you’re able to see it for what it is – a story that you made up based often on one isolated incident – it’s also hilarious and wonderful. Befriending your inner dialogue that you created when you were a child and using it to motivate you rather than destroy you is the foundation for your success in the influence game.

Learning the influence game, like any other game, starts with understanding the strategies and rules. One of the most important tools you can develop is to learn about and understand the concept of broad-scale or mass influence.


Get your FREE digital copy of Mass Influence at and sign up for your complimentary 30 Day Influence Challenge.  

Or follow along daily as we post the entire book out for your assistance


Bras, big problems and breaking all the rules

September 22, 2015 3 Comments

Here’s a conversation that shifted my thinking 180 degrees.

“You mean you want me to give up my push up bra?” I laugh as I talk to Judy van Niekerk on Skype.

Judy van Niekerk 2015She smiles lovingly. “You just said your bra hurts Teresa. And you’re telling me you want to keep it?”

“But that’s women’s lot in life” I say jokingly.  “Our shoes hurt. Our bras hurt. That’s part of being beautiful and sexy.”

Maybe I’m not joking. Maybe I really do believe this.

I can see how Judy is starting to disrupt my thinking.

I teach empowerment as part of teaching influence, yet here I am buying into the belief system that women (most notable me) should hurt themselves in the name of beauty.

You often hear me talk about “how big of a problem do you solve for the world?”

Consider this.  80% of women complain their bras hurt and 80–85% of women wear a bra of an incorrect size.  Couple that with the fact that many leading cancer experts believe underwire and push up bras may be a contributing factor to breast cancer.  

Now what do you have?  One big problem.  A generation of women not focused on the fact that they’re hurting themselves and their health.  

Enter the rule breaker. Judy van Niekerk is a successful entrepreneur who grew up in South Africa and now hails from London.  As a survivor of horrific incest, Judy has become a powerhouse in the women’s empowerment movement and is truly one of the most inspiring women I know.

Now Judy has made it her goal to disrupt this destructive thinking of women with the Digital Bra.  Judy has developed an app for your smart phone. You’ll be able to scan your body, in the privacy of your home, upload a custom template of your torso, and have a custom digital bra made in the latest micro-fibre technology.  These bras are beautiful in their simplicity.

So let’s talk about Judy as an example of what I teach. You often hear me talk about what creates wildfire word of mouth. The spark that lights your wildfire is the problem you solve for the world. Big spark catches easy.

Next week, Judy will be launching a kickstarter campaign to pre-sell enough digital bras to launch a revolutions in women’s thinking and stop women from thinking it’s OK to wear bra’s that hurt.

And every wildfire needs fuel and and wind – passion and relationships.  Judy is a dynamo. As a survivor of horrific incest her story has been covered across the world and she is beloved by people in the transformation and empowerment movement.

As someone who’s had my thinking disrupted, I am her biggest RAVing fan.  

Want to be part of a wildfire word of mouth Pandemic? Be the wind in this wildfire and get our daughters and nieces and friends to stop thinking it’s OK to wear clothing that hurts in the name of beauty.  Give a shoutout to Judy


You “shouldn’t” have preferences

September 12, 2015 Leave a Comment

Screen Shot 2015-09-11 at 7.13.24 PMChris Cade writes one of my favourite newsletters. This is one of his most exquisite posts yet. Reprinted here with permission.


In many spiritual paths, great value is placed on becoming a person with no preferences…

This is an extension of the ideas around detachment / unattachment and nonduality. The underlying premise (promise?) is that if we don’t have preferences about how life “should” go, then we won’t have to feel pain, disappointment, and the other negative emotions that take away our peace and inner well-being.

You know what I have to say about that?

In most cases, it’s total hogwash!

I don’t know about you, but I kind of like having preferences. 🙂

Suggesting that I “shouldn’t” love chocolate, raw milk, sunshine, the beach, and my son is pretty ridiculous in my book.

While I don’t claim to know the Divine purpose of life, nor can I explain scientifically with proof lots of Universal happenings and mysteries, I do know one thing:

No matter what’s happening, if at all possible, I might as well enjoy the ride!

More seriously though, I think a lot of people who subscribe to the “no preferences” theory are mistaking the difference between preference and the attachment to their preferences.

I absolutely love chocolate and have it daily. I prefer chocolate over vanilla.

That doesn’t make vanilla bad. Nor will my peace of mind and heart be shattered if I never had chocolate again.

And I still prefer chocolate. 🙂

When we are totally Present and living in the moment, we also discover something really special about preferences:

Preferences are expressions of us being drawn to what we love.

Let that sink in for a moment.

Coming full circle…

“Enlightenment” isn’t about becoming a mindless automaton who “has no preferences.”

That’s no more enlightened than an ameoba.

Enlightenment is quite the opposite…

It includes being a mindful, conscious present being who is totally in touch with his/her preferences.

(even when those preferences aren’t manifested)

Your Partner In Enjoying Preferences,
Chris Cade

To sign up for Chris’ daily newsletter and Course in Miracles readings click here –

The 4 Pillers

September 8, 2015 Leave a Comment

The 4 Pillers by T. Allen Hanes – from his bestselling book Your Debut as An Elite Thought Leader

The marketing platform is built on four time-tested and proven pillars:

·         Positioning
·         People
·         Products
·         ProcessScreen Shot 2015-09-08 at 7.58.47 AM

Beneath these pillars is a system…as solid as bedrock…that supports the entire structure and ensures that everything just works.

In the Last 10 Years, There Have Been Dramatic Changes in the Marketplace.

The competitive landscape for those in what has become known as the “Helping Professions” has changed dramatically over the last several years, and will continue to change at an unprecedented pace.

Why? The continued development and distribution of technology has radically changed the way audiences are learning about rising Thought Leaders, about what they do, how they research them, and how they decide if that person can help them or not.

1. Search
2. Social
3. Mobile

A Renewed Focus on the Fundamentals!Given all of these revolutionary changes we’ve discussed—search, social and mobile—you might be worried that you are going to have to learn how to use complicated technology or spend huge amounts of money to build your You, Inc. platform in order to reach your audience.

Meet the Four Pillars Growth System.

Now, let’s talk about the four marketing elements or pillars that need to be optimized in order to maximize growth in today’s wired, always-on and hyper-competitive marketplace.

The funny thing is, the pillars we’re about to present aren’t even new!

They’re not gimmicks that were cooked up in an ivory tower or by some pie-in-the-sky TED-talk guru.

They’re proven concepts that have been tested, re-tested and tested again in the marketplace.

Now, sure, some of the tactics have changed, but the principles themselves haven’t.

They are:

●     Positioning
●     People
●     Product
●     Process

These are the four foundational marketing pillars *every* business needs to plan for and optimize to maximize its growth potential.  These are the pillars that support the You, Inc. platform which lifts you above everyone else shouting “Me, Too!!!” to your audience.

Data shows, and our experience proves, that each of these pillars can account for about 25 percent growth on its own, and combined have a compounding effect that can ignite growth to 100 percent or more.

Let’s run through each element and explore how maximizing these pillars will significantly impact the growth at You, Inc.

T. Allen Hanes   #1 Best Selling Author, International Speaker. As Seen On ABC, CBS, NBC, FOX, CNN, Miami Herald, Forbes, USA Today, T. Allen Hanes & Associates –